What every NHL team wants for Christmas
PUBLICATION
Jay Tup
December 24, 2021 (1:32 PM)
This year for Christmas every NHL team has a special wish for the holidays, here's what they are.
Anaheim Ducks
The Ducks want something very selfless all the Ducks want for Christmas is for John Tortorella to have some fun and maybe to smile.
Arizona CoyotesThe Coyotes really only have three things on their wish list
Shane Wright, money to pay rent and for the team to still be in Arizona when Matthews is a free agent.
Boston Bruins
The Bruins want to not be on the nice list because they miss being the Big Bad Bruins or David Krejci they'd take him too
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Buffalo Sabres
The Sabres really want attendence to climb over 60% but they'd settle for Shane Wright.
Calgary Flames
The Flames want the City of Calgary to just give in and pay for their new arena no question asked. They'd even be okay with a little elf labour in the off season if they work cheap enough.
Carolina Hurricanes
The Hurricanes want world peace and for Freddy Andersen's groin to hold up all season.
Chicago BlackhawksThe Blackhawks want people to forgive them for the Kyle Beach situation, but they'd settle for someone finding the version of
Seth Jones that they traded for to finally show up.
Colorado AvalancheAll the Avalanche want is for
Nathan MacKinnon to actually take a team friendly deal and not keep saying he already did when we all know he didn't.
Columbus Blue Jackets
All the Blue Jackets want is for the Blackhawks pick to not be in the top 2!
Dallas StarsThe Dallas Stars just want
Jamie Benn to stop being so damn selfish or to at least stop tweeting about how selfish he is.
Detroit Red Wings
The Red Wings want to fast forward two years to when they're back to being a Stanley Cup contender under Stevie Y.
Edmonton Oilers
The Oilers would like a time machine so they could turn back time to when Duncan Keith was a top 4 dman.
Florida PanthersThe Panthers just want
Sergei Bobrovsky to play like he did for the first 6 weeks of the season.
Los Angeles KingsThe LA Kings want
Quinton Byfield to stay healthy so they can finally get Kopitar to tutor him.
Minnesota Wild
The Wild wanted compliance buyouts for Suter and Parise instead they got a bunch of dead cap space, so they'll settle for an Apple Watch
Montreal CanadiensThe Canadiens want to trade
Carey Price for an absolute haul while not retaining any salary. But they'd also settle for a couple new french speaking coaches and executives for them to choose from.
Nashville Predators
The Predators want to harness that Nashville playoff vibe and become Smashville one more time under David Polie.
New Jersey Devils
The Devils want PK Subban to keep up his blemish free record when it comes to suspensions.
New York IslandersThe Islanders want
John Tavares to know how much they hate him and even years later he's still a snake or to not be last place, but they'd rather the JT thing.
Ottawa Senators
The Senators want a new arena that isn't two and a half hours away from the nearest city.
Philadelphia Flyers
The Flyers want to know what they did wrong with Carter Hart and how to fix it.
Pittsburgh PenguinsBrian Burke wants Pierre McGuire to stop calling every 15 minutes asking about trading for
Sidney Crosby.
San Jose SharksThe Sharks really just want to trade
Evander Kane. They don't really care about what they get back but they don't want anyone on the naughty list on their team.
Seattle KrakenThe Kraken want a do over at the expansion draft and to have not signed
Philipp Grubauer Tampa Bay Lightning
The Lightning want to find a way to circumvent the salary cap again for a chance at another Stanley Cup.
Toronto Maple Leafs
The Leafs want their fanbase to stop arguing over which player is better, Marner or Nylander. Just kidding, they want to make it out of the first round.
Vancouver Canucks The Canucks want
Elias Pettersson to start playing like their fans said he could. You remember Swedish Gretzky?
Vegas Golden Knights
The Golden Knights want to continue to be the only team in NHL history to have never experienced pain or embarrassment.
Washington Capitals
895 That's it.
Winnipeg Jets
Winnipeg just really wants an airport because those long bus rides out of province are just getting tiring.
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